"Much-Afraid"

Today my heart is aching as I wait for the Lord to work on our behalf. I know that He will work, I know that He is always good, and I know that He will do it in His time. I know He hears my prayers. . . . .I believe He will answer them.

Here is an exerpt from "Hinds' Feet on High Places" By Hannah Hurnard

She (Much-Afraid) looked at the little pile in her lap and asked herself dully. "Shall I throw them away? Were they not all worthless promises which he gave me on the way here?" Then with icy fingers she picked up the first sone and repeated the first words that he had spoken to her beside the pool. "I will make thy feet like hinds' feet and set thee upon High Places" (Hab. 3:19). She held the stone in her hand for a long time, then said slowly. "I have not received hinds' feet, but I am on higher places than I ever imagined possible, and if I die up here, what does it matter? I will not throw it away."
She put the stone back in the bag, picked up the next and repeated, "What I do thou knowest not now; but thou shalt know hereafter" (John13:7); and she gave a little sob and said, "Half at least of that is true, and who knows whether the other half is true or not--but I will not throw it away."
Picking up the third stone, she quoted, "This is not unto death, but for the glory of God" (John 13:7). "Not unto death," she repeated, "even though he says, 'Offer the promise as a Burnt Offering'?" But she dropped the stone back into the bag and took the fourth. "Bread corn is bruised. . . .but no one crushes it forever" (Isa. 28:28). "I cannot part with that ," she said. replaced it in the bag, and took the fifth. "Cannot I do with you as the Potter? saith the Lord" (Jer. 18:6). "Yes" said she, and put it back in to the bag.
Taking the sixth, she repeated, "O thou afflicted, tossed with the tempest, and not comforted, behold, I will lay thy stones with fair colors. . " (Isa. 54:11), then could go no farther but wept bitterly. "How could I part with that?" she asked herself, and she put it in the bag with the others, and took out the seventh. "My sheep hear my voice, and they follow me" (John 10:27). "Shall I not throw this one away?" she asked herself. "Have I really heard his voice, or have I been deceiving myself all the time?"
Then as she thought of his face when he gave her that promise she replaced it in the bag, saying, "I will keep it. How can I let it go?" and took the eighth. "Now shalt thou see what I will do" (Ex. 6:1). Remembering the precipice which had seemed so terribly impossible and how he had brought her to the top, she put the stone with the others and took the ninth. "God is not man that he should lie. . . hath he said, and shall he not do it? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good?" (Num. 23:19).
For a very long time she sat trembling with that stone in her hand, but in the end she said, "I have already given the only answer possible whe I told him, 'If thou canst, thou mayest deceive me.'"
Then she dropped the icy-cold little pebble into the bag and took the tenth. "Thine ears shall hear a word behind thee, saying, 'This is the way, walk ye in it, when ye turn to the right hand, and when ye turn to the left'" (Isa. 30:21). At that she shuddered, but after a while added, "Thou hast little strength, and hast not denied thy name. . . . .Hold that fast which thou hast, that no man take thy crown" (Rev. 3:8, 11).
Returning the tenth stone to the bag, after a long pause she picked up an ugly little stone lying on the floor of the cave and dropped it in beside the other ten, saying, "Though he slay me, yet I will trust in him" (Job 13:15). Tying up the bag again, she said, "Though everything in the world should tell me that they are worthless--yet I cannot part with them," and she put the bag once again in her bosom.
(From pages 202-204 in Hinds' Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard)

Oh how often I am "Much-Afraid" in this story. I easily question the credability of God's promises. And yet, when I ponder the gospel and ALL that Christ has done for me, I am humbled and the promises are worth more then the finest gold. May my heart ache with hope, knowing that Christ is my all and ALL is His.